Flaking, Flaking, Flaker: Never Flake in Business or Personal Life

No one likes a Flaker. You know the type, a person that commits to something 100% and then cancels a touch before the commitment. Or worse, they fail to show up at all and let nobody know.

Yes yes yes, we all know the type. Let me dig in here.

When we built Sanico Software we started with a few inner core principles. Principles we never stated out aloud but instead knew subconsciously. One major one, NEVER EVER FLAKE ON CLIENTS.

Why? Because, as I stated at the start, no one likes a flaker. It works the same in business. When you flake on a client, in particular when you COMMIT to a specific date 100% and fail to follow through you will tarnish your reputation. Like sinking sand, the more you flake, the worse your reputation sinks.

From personal flaking to flaking in business, it all ends the same, in disappointment.

Frequency Matters

“Right right right, Sav I get it, but what if they have a super valid reason?”

Valid reasons exist, for example, the other day an engineer on our team said to me that a family member of theirs passed away. They asked for a day off work and without a second thought I granted it. They asked if I required a certificate to show proof. I scoffed to myself, I required no certificate.

“But Sav, what if they are a flaker and they are lying?”

Ahhhhh let me explain further. This engineer never ever flakes. The total opposite, they show up on time to everything with zero cancellations or excuses. They created a flawless reputation for themselves. Therefore, if they call me and ask for the day off for ANY reason I will grant it happily. Frequency matters.

Let me paint another picture, if my engineer arrived at my desk with a continual flow of cancellations and excuses every month then I will start to lose trust in their authenticity.

I shall illustrate this with a fun little dialogue.

Today

Engineer X: “Hey Sav, I can’t make it to work today, I caught the flu.”

Me: “Rest up, no stress at all, we’ll see you back next week.”

One Month Later

Engineer X: “Yoyoyo Sav, sorry dude but I have another commitment, I accidentally double booked, I can’t make it to work today.”

Me: “Happens to everyone, don’t worry about it, see you tomorrow.”

Two Months Later

Engineer X: “Savvvv you won’t believe this, I got a flat tire, I’m stuck on the high way, I can’t come in today.”

Me: “Alright, fix it up and we’ll chat later.”

Three Months Later

Engineer X: “Boss man Sav, I can’t…”

Me: “Let me stop you there, if you flake nearly every month how am I meant to believe the authenticity of your excuses?”

Alright enough with the dialog, let me summarise the point. If someone flakes with a bunch of excuses with a high level of frequency it begins to lead to doubt. A person will think the flaker is one of the following,

1. A super unlucky person.
2. Suffers from commitmentitis.
3. Overbooks themselves with commitments.
4. Lacks respect for the other person.
5. Compulsively lies.
6. Fails at self-organisation skills.

The story of the boy who cried wolf strikes me as the perfect metaphor to demonstrate my point. With a high frequency of flakes people begin to question your authenticity.

A Flaky Business, A Flaky Reputation

If you flake in business you will create a terrible reputation. Clients will lose trust in your judgement, the authenticity of your word, and your ability to fulfil a project.

In business, I avoid to give unrealistic expectations or oversell an impossible deadline. Sometimes clients ask me how long will it take to create their website. I answer back with the truth, 1 to 2 months dependent on the complexity, the number of revisions required, how long it takes for the client to respond to requests for information, and more.

I prefer to refuse client work with an unachievable timeline then risk to flake on an inevitable train wreck that will tarnish my reputation.

One business I know sold their client on a deadline that they lacked the resources to achieve. Why? Because they wanted to land the job and said anything the client wanted to hear. They eventually failed to meet the deadline and flaked for weeks on end with unbelievable excuses. This led to a disappointed client, a stressed business owner, and a delayed job. A lose-lose for everyone involved.

I remember another example of a small business I worked for that failed to pay their bill for months. For anonymity sake I will call them Jobo’s Fish and Chip. I followed them up several times, they either ignored the email or said they would pay at the end of the week but flaked every time.

I turned to my business partner and said: “This business will not last, if they flake payments with us they must flake payments with everybody”. I give generous timelines to businesses that fail to pay but after several friendly followups I am eventually forced to seek legal remedies. On a final warning where I raised the prospect of legal proceedings Jobo’s Fish and Chip paid immediately.

What ended happening to the business? Several months later they closed their entire shop and disappeared from the face of the planet. They closed their shop for unknown reasons but, in my opinion, their flakiness acted as a telltale sign to their demise. If the owner opened dialog with me and confessed their financial difficulties I would set up a payment plan and accept the money slowly. However, instead they evaded me out of shame and continually flaked when I sent friendly reminders.

Flake Away

“Ok Sav, you caught me, I am a flaker, what’s the cure?”

Do not fear, Sav is here. I will give a few tips on how to avoid the reputation of a flaker,

1. Never Overcommit: Early on in my life I realised that if I overcommit then I will begin to flake. I am not super human, I am limited by time. I therefore prefer to give a commitment level of 100% to few things than a commitment level of 50% to 1000 things.
2. No Excuses: Never give someone excuses, give the honest truth. Tell them the reason you cancelled and that it will not happen again. Then ensure it NEVER happens again.
3. No People Pleasing: Say no to plans. Never say “yes” to please someone when in reality you plan to cancel later. The disappointment of a straight no hurts less than a last minute flake.
4. Seek Help: If you suffer from social anxiety which leads you to cancel on friends, family, or general commitments then seek professional therapy. It’s shameful to flake, it’s not shameful to seek help.

While not a sliver bullet I am sure the tips above may help someone on their path to shed their flakey reputation.

Helplessly Flaking

It exists, the helpless flaker. Go ahead, show them the timeline of their flakes with the list of their weak excuses, attempt to cause their “broken glass” moment. I apologise dear reader, no matter how much you protest sometimes a person will flake, even if you address the problem to them directly.

I once approached an old friend of mine to discuss their flakey behaviour, they admitted fault, felt shocked to hear of their wrong doing, and proclaimed to change their ways. After several months they continued to flake on catchups, birthdays, events, and other commitments.

You reach a cross roads and in the end you either accept a persons flakiness or part ways with the relationship. You can take a horse to water but you can’t make it drink.

The End

Whether a person or a business, a flake ends in the same outcome, disappointment.

The flaking, flaking, flaker.

Now my dear reader, I implore you to self reflect, are you a flaker?